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Category Archives: Journey

Full Moon

 

The full moon this month was glorious. Being out at the cabin and seeing it rise over the tree tops, and shine brightly in the ever darkening night sky was simply breath-taking. It also brought with it the highest tides of the summer, a 32 footer! We nearly waited too long to get off the beach Tuesday when we came back from the cabin. We had a few moments of driving in the sea water, which was nearly over our seats… yeah. I’d like to avoid any more of that! 😉

 

 

We are loosing light steadily now. You can tell the difference after about 9 pm. It’s getting more “dusky” at night now, and around midnight, you really could use a flashlight to head to the outhouse. It’s amazing how quickly it happens actually. In another couple of months we’ll be seeing plunging temps and much darker nights. We might actually need these headlights that they make us drive “on for safety” with.

 

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Pictures!!!

 

Finally, yes finally, I have uploaded some pictures. My laptop wont allow me to download photos, something is messed up with my program I guess, anyway, I have to go to Wal-Mart, download from the camera, access the photos via CD then I can upload them to the blog. It’s quite a process…

 

 

So I’ve updated some past posts with photos and then of course my new posts have their pictures with them. Scroll through and look at the old posts if you want to see some great scenery shots and see us on our grand adventure in The Great Land!

Taken at Homer

Taken at Homer

 

A Hair Raising Adventure

 

I knew coming up here would be an adventure of epic proportions. But you just never fully appreciate that until you are in the midst of the adventure! Know what I mean??

 

 

We drove up the beach and then at the half-way point (Leif’s Creek) we went up the trail called Jacob’s Ladder to reach the main trail. Let me tell you a bit about Jacob’s Ladder. I’m not sure how it got its name but I suspect that it has something to do with the fact that its is a very steep incline. You just go straight up, up and up. Right along the edge of a bluff, probably a 60 foot or more drop in places. So just like Jacob from the Bible, it seems like you’re going straight up to heaven at certain points. Once you get to the “top” you find a muddy mess of a trail. It’s bumpy with tree roots, logs and rocks that others have thrown into holes to try to make it passable. Last month when we came up, this was the first place we got stuck, so I did have some apprehension about going up that way… some.

 

 

I was driving a borrowed 4-wheeled rig called a razor. It’s a cute little thing, drives like a car, has seat belts and window restraints and a roll-cage. Well I understand why now… the thing also has very low clearance underneath. So you high-centered easily and it’s a wee bit tippy.

 

 

We were following Dean and Thing 1 who were on his wheeler through the fist muddy hole mess (and the mud really stinks, I call it the “bog of eternal stench”. Thing 2 said when we got up there, “it smells like someone had horses up here”. Horse poop in other words. I’d say pig poop is more like it though.) I was trying to watch where he went through and follow him exactly. He went high around this big mud hole and I followed him. The razor is a bit wider than the wheeler, and my passenger side wheels went off into the hole…. then the rest of it went off. Right over onto its side… in the mud. Like an old mare who just laid down on her rider. It was slow motion, and we just watched as we tipped over. Thing 2 and Little bit were safely belted into the seat but let’s just say they were a little freaked out over the “turn of events”. 😉 Once I ascertained if they were alright, and they were fine-just scared, I released their buckle and put them out on to dry land. Then Dean and I went to work with the wench to get me out of the mud. It took two wenches (the wheeler’s and the razor’s) and a lot of “get on the gas” to get out, but we did. Then we were on our way again.

 

 

We have never seen such adventure before! 😉 But this is the reality of life at Gray Cliffs. You get stuck, you wench out. You wear mud boots and rain gear to keep the mud off of you, and believe you me, I was glad to have my rain gear on that day! You learn how to get through the mud if you can’t avoid it. I’m learning.

 

 

Ashes to Ashes

 

Dust to dust

 

 

We had our memorial for Dad at the cabin yesterday, (Tuesday 7/23). He is finally resting where he wanted to be, well mostly anyway.

 

Dad's ashes and the photo Tami took.

Dad’s ashes and the photo Tami took.

 

We had a nice gathering of close friends and family. Mike, Tami and Allie, Skylar, Scott and Deni, Dean, Aunt Char and Uncle Ray, Aunt Dee and Uncle Eugene and of course myself and the kids. Tami and Deni arranged the food and brought us a wonderful array of local flavor: moose burgers, elk sausage, deep-fried zucchini and cauliflower (one of Dad’s specialties), salads… so much food. And all so good.

Mike grilling up some awesome moose burgers and elk sausages!

Mike grilling up some awesome moose burgers and elk sausages!

 

Good food!

Good food!

 

We spent about 4 hours together out there. Looking around, laughing, reminiscing, taking pictures. A true final good-bye.

 

All of us, Mike was behind the camera.

All of us, Mike was behind the camera.

 

Then we took his ashes to the garden. Dad had told others that he wanted to be next to Fritz and Okie (his dog and cat who are buried there). Aunt Dee and Uncle Ray scattered some of his ashes in the wind over the garden. We buried some next to Okie, and then Aunt Dee took some back to Linda.

 

 

Mike dug a small hole next to Okie for Dad’s ashes, then we planted a Forget-Me-Not over the top. A fitting plant I’d say. Both Alaska’s state flower, and true to its name, we will never forget the man they called Chuck, and I called Dad.

 

 

The finality of it. Both full of sorrow and yet good knowing that to the best of my ability, I was doing what Dad wanted. Dad’s wishes are what matters.

 

Sums it up well...

Sums it up well…

 

Baruch b’shem YHVH. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord.

 

 

Five Minutes

 

Five minutes doesn’t seem to much to ask. Jut 5 little minutes.

 

As I approach this memorial service for my Dad, family coming up, scattering his ashes at the cabin, I find myself completely unprepared.

 

Having his sisters and his brother in laws here, having to say those final, final, goodbyes. I don’t’ want to. I want to run away a hide. I want to put it off for two more months. I want to pretend he’s still here, somewhere, waiting.

 

But I can’t.

 

The tears come and I can’t stop them.

 

They overwhelm me at times. Times when even the fast pace of life and the hurdles I face as a single mother can’t even keep me distracted. I just want 5 more minutes with him. Will this feeling ever go away?

 

Fireweed

English: Fireweed – Epilobium angustifolium

English: Fireweed – Epilobium angustifolium (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The fireweed is in bloom, has been for
a couple of weeks now. I’ve longed to see it since I was here in ’94.
The Northern Lights are the only thing I still long to see here in
The Great Land now that I’m enjoying the fireweed!

 

The flowers are vibrant, bright pink
and tall, my Seester would love them! I hear tell there’s a place
down by Homer that has hills that are simply covered with the it and
it looks like the hills are on fire. I hope to see that soon.

 

Fireweed is our signal that summer is
nearing its end. Our daylight hours are already starting to wane.
This time next month we will really be noticing the difference.

 

Important

If nothing else, the last month has reminded me of some of the most important things in life: family, friendship, faith, fun. And why do they all begin with the let “F”?? lol

 

 

Family: I miss my family greatly, my Mom and Richie. It’s hard not being able to jump in the van and drive down for dinner or just to say “Hi”. I miss those fuzzy mustache Richie kisses. My Seester is missing from me. Her vibrant love of life, her sarcasm. Her flamboyant style, hot pink and all. 🙂 And I miss John too, and his cooking. Don’t miss his farts tho. Nope. I miss my buddy Ace too.

 

 

Friendship: Elizabeth. Yep, miss her greatly. Our weekly visits and kid’s play time. Her brownies… 😉 Her smile and gentle spirit. I miss Teresa and Greg. Our Monday night Bible studies, our “Like-mindedness” in so many areas. Miss our fellowship times and camping fun.

 

 

Faith: I haven’t lost my faith by any means, but being here sort of isolated at the moment, I feel a little lost. We have tried to keep some semblance of routine with Torah readings and blessings, but with working long hours and being gone so much, it is really hard to do. I miss our fellowship and Bible study times with our friends. And I miss having the internet so I can watch/listen to weekly lessons. I hope that’s remedied soon.

 

 

Fun: ha. All work and no play makes Brandi a dull girl instead of a “fine” girl. Hiking, fishing, camping, 4-wheeling, bike riding… all these things I’d hoped to do A LOT of, well, we’ve done a bit of it, but not near enough here lately. Gonna have to work on that! More beach trips, and hiking trails are in our future. 😉 With only about 2 ½ months until freeze-up, we’d better get a move on! Then we’ll be ready winter fun activities. Snowmobiling mostly… more trips to the cabin, lots of cabin time I hope! A toasty fire and some hot cocoa.

 

 

If you’re mentioned above, I hope you know how much I love and miss you. If you’re not mentioned above, I hope you also know how much I love and miss you in my life as well. Just had to limit it to the highlights you know? 😉

 

Dip Netters

English: Traditional Salmon Fishing, Fraser Ri...

English: Traditional Salmon Fishing, Fraser River, Canada Deutsch: Traditionelles Lachsfischen, Fraser River, Kanada (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Well, dip net season is open. Dip nets
are huge fishing nets, that fishermen use to catch large quantities of salmon
at once. The season opened on Wednesday. Lots of travelers and tourists here in town now. People from Minnesota, Texas, North
Carolina, Canada, Sweden… Washington, California, & Japan. All
over the world, they come here to catch our red salmon. And drink,
boy can they drink. Once the nets come in, they head to their
campers/tents/hotel rooms and sauce it up… Fish fast, drink faster.
Talk about a different experience.

We have avoided the beach since it’s
“combat fishing” down there. And plenty of dead fish carcasses
and litter. As soon as dip net season is over, we’ll head back down
with lots of trash bags to start cleaning up the mess they
leave…
Until then, we’ll stay off of the beach.

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A Good Sabbath

 

This has been a rough week. Between working 4 closing nights in a row (including one very busy night with no help), the emotionally charged days of July 4th and 5th, and learning about Howard’s death (the first death I’ve had to process since Dad’s), I’m exhausted.

 

 

But…

 

 

We got up this morning and read our Torah portion. We read about the Israelites coming into the Promised land, crossing over the Jordan River and finally getting their inheritance. Finally. After 40long years, and several battles, the children of Israel were home. YHVH shows his faithfulness and keeps his word, once again. We have this promise to stand on, that YHVH will always keep his word.

 

After our Torah portion we put in some praise music and enjoyed the peaceful environment that always creates.

 

 

A good sabbath.

 

 

It seems that no matter what our Torah portion is about, there is always something in it that corresponds to our current life situation. I can see several parallels here. YHVH is faithful, even when we are not. He even keeps our end of the bargain through Yeshua. And when we are not faithful, we have the ability to turn from our evil-doing, and there he is, faithfully waiting. (this is not license to do evil, but his mercy and grace). We do the best we can with what we have at times.

 

This Torah portion mentions Caleb (Kaleb) a few times. I always enjoy the portions with Caleb in them. Caleb was faithful. His faith is an inspiration to us all. Even in the face of giants, Caleb was faithful, along with Joshua (Yehoshua).

 

 

I wish I were more like Caleb and Joshua. I wish that my faith wouldn’t waiver in the face of giants. But it does. I’m human. I make wrong decisions. I do the best I can with what I have, and I walk on.

 

Melancholy

 

You know that feeling, bittersweet memories. Looking back over the years and reminiscing.
Yesterday, my former co-worker and friend Louise called me to let me know that one of our supervisors from the Post Office had passed away. His name was Howard.

 

Howard was a great guy, just a few years older than me. He brought a ray of sunshine to our dark work environment. He was fun, loved to joke and laugh. He was fair. Having a fair boss makes a huge difference in your outlook at work.

 

Howard was a husband and father. I know that this loss is great for them, I’m grieved for his wife and kids.

 

Working at the post office for my first three years was no picnic. There was always someone stirring the pot, making the clerks mad at the carriers or inner fighting in our own ranks, so much drama in efforts to keep us occupied and off of management’s back. Add to that the nonsense of the union, and the red tape and bureaucracy of government regulations, oh yeah, and a tyrant for a boss, and you can imagine it wasn’t a nice place to work. Howard made it bearable for me and others. He brought a fresh perspective. He didn’t make decisions solely based on his own advancement or what would look good to his boss. I respect him for that. He was a peacemaker.

 

Howard died just a few days after my Dad did, on April 6. I think of his kids. They would be teens by now. How they must feel, loosing their Dad unexpectedly and during such a formative time in their life. My heart aches for them, I know that pain.
I think of his wife Lynette. Loosing a spouse that you genuinely loved and expected to live out your days with, I can’t imagine what that feels like. My heart aches for her, but I have not known that kind of pain.

 

Some people come into our lives for only a short period of time. But they leave a lasting impression on us. Howard was one of those people in my life.
Rest peacefully my friend.